I have created a new blog for my sermons. This is because I have really enjoyed sharing the sermon I preached on Sunday, and I have received a lot of good feedback about it.
My new blog is Sermons From One Who is Longing for Home.
Tell me what you think.
Friday, September 22, 2006
Sunday, September 17, 2006
Kingdom of God ala Disney
This blog entry is from part of a sermon I preached on James 3:1-12.
You know, I think Jesus went about this earth trying to let people know what heaven was like. Something about the kingdom of God maybe. It actually reminds me of a movie. It is one that your teenagers and pre-teens know about. And even my three-year-old ds knows about this one. I have a dvd player in my car to keep my ds occupied—and boy, does it ever work. My ds’s favorite movie right now is High School Musical, and I have listened to it over and over as I drive him around town: to school, to soccer, to church. So if you happen to see me in my mini-van, driving around and singing (and maybe even dancing a little) please know that I am not possessed.
High School Musical is a made-for-tv movie whose main audience is teenagers and tweens (or pre-teens). It is a musical, so there is dancing and singing—and a message. You see, the movie is about Troy, the basketball star, and Gabriella, the science genius. They are from separate worlds, separate cliques, but they find a common bond in singing. Their classmates get more and more anxious about the blurring of lines and the threat to the status quo of the school. In the climax of the movie, Troy is confronted by his basketball team. They trick him into saying that Gabriella means nothing and the singing is just a way to keep his nerves down before the big championship game. And Gabriella’s science friends show her through streaming video what Troy has said. See how much trouble came from Troy’s tongue? Of course, it is a Disney movie, so the ending is a happy one. Troy asks for forgiveness, and Troy and Gabriella do sing in the audition. The whole school, from basketball jocks to science geeks, from skater dudes to drama queens—everyone realizes that they are a part of the school, and they are all in this world together.
And that is where something reminds me about the kingdom of God. Jesus came to a world full of cliques. The Pharisees thought they were the most devout. The Zealots thought they were the most passionate. The rich ruled over the poor. The Romans dwelled in the land. And in the face of it all, a carpenter walked among them and taught them about the kingdom of God. It is a place of unity for us. Paul told the Ephesians to “make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace” (4:3 TNIV). That same unity will ensure that we have blessings instead of cursings, fresh water instead of salt water, love instead of hate.
You know, I think Jesus went about this earth trying to let people know what heaven was like. Something about the kingdom of God maybe. It actually reminds me of a movie. It is one that your teenagers and pre-teens know about. And even my three-year-old ds knows about this one. I have a dvd player in my car to keep my ds occupied—and boy, does it ever work. My ds’s favorite movie right now is High School Musical, and I have listened to it over and over as I drive him around town: to school, to soccer, to church. So if you happen to see me in my mini-van, driving around and singing (and maybe even dancing a little) please know that I am not possessed.
High School Musical is a made-for-tv movie whose main audience is teenagers and tweens (or pre-teens). It is a musical, so there is dancing and singing—and a message. You see, the movie is about Troy, the basketball star, and Gabriella, the science genius. They are from separate worlds, separate cliques, but they find a common bond in singing. Their classmates get more and more anxious about the blurring of lines and the threat to the status quo of the school. In the climax of the movie, Troy is confronted by his basketball team. They trick him into saying that Gabriella means nothing and the singing is just a way to keep his nerves down before the big championship game. And Gabriella’s science friends show her through streaming video what Troy has said. See how much trouble came from Troy’s tongue? Of course, it is a Disney movie, so the ending is a happy one. Troy asks for forgiveness, and Troy and Gabriella do sing in the audition. The whole school, from basketball jocks to science geeks, from skater dudes to drama queens—everyone realizes that they are a part of the school, and they are all in this world together.
And that is where something reminds me about the kingdom of God. Jesus came to a world full of cliques. The Pharisees thought they were the most devout. The Zealots thought they were the most passionate. The rich ruled over the poor. The Romans dwelled in the land. And in the face of it all, a carpenter walked among them and taught them about the kingdom of God. It is a place of unity for us. Paul told the Ephesians to “make every effort to keep the unity of the Spirit through the bond of peace” (4:3 TNIV). That same unity will ensure that we have blessings instead of cursings, fresh water instead of salt water, love instead of hate.
Wednesday, September 13, 2006
Faith Questions
The other thing that made me want to blog concerned something our guest speaker said.
The guest speaker on Sunday gave part of his testimony. He made sure to say that he had been brought up in church, but there was a moment that he knew that he was saved. He went on to say that we should examine our own lives to make sure that we could pinpoint the moment that we were saved.
I have a real problem with this idea.
I was brought up in the church. I publicly accepted Christ at age eight. I see my conversion experience as more of a spiritual journey than a Pauline conversion experience (remember the road to Damascus?). When I was about twelve years old, a revival speaker scared me so much with this idea of "knowing the exact moment or you are not saved" that I publicly accepted Christ for the second time and asked to be rebaptized. But that second baptism was a mistake.
An eight year old accepts as an eight year old knows how. And I am confident that I was saved at eight. The fear that the revival speaker placed in my heart was something else. It was meant for that person that was never saved. This idea of knowing the moment you are saved went hand in hand with something else that was said that night--you had to know without a doubt that you were saved. Now doesn't that notion make me laugh these days? There is no one who does not doubt at some point in their life. Even Mother Teresa had her doubts. A statement like that, to impressionable girls of twelve years (as my friend and I were that age), to girls who are trying to be the devout followers of Christ...let me just say that it was poison to our souls.
Who is able to analyze our faith and decide if it is genuine?
And so, I had some disagreements with what happened in our worship service last Sunday. As I prepare and deliver the sermon this coming Sunday (our pastor is on vacation), let me be conscience of my words and true to the message of Christ.
The guest speaker on Sunday gave part of his testimony. He made sure to say that he had been brought up in church, but there was a moment that he knew that he was saved. He went on to say that we should examine our own lives to make sure that we could pinpoint the moment that we were saved.
I have a real problem with this idea.
I was brought up in the church. I publicly accepted Christ at age eight. I see my conversion experience as more of a spiritual journey than a Pauline conversion experience (remember the road to Damascus?). When I was about twelve years old, a revival speaker scared me so much with this idea of "knowing the exact moment or you are not saved" that I publicly accepted Christ for the second time and asked to be rebaptized. But that second baptism was a mistake.
An eight year old accepts as an eight year old knows how. And I am confident that I was saved at eight. The fear that the revival speaker placed in my heart was something else. It was meant for that person that was never saved. This idea of knowing the moment you are saved went hand in hand with something else that was said that night--you had to know without a doubt that you were saved. Now doesn't that notion make me laugh these days? There is no one who does not doubt at some point in their life. Even Mother Teresa had her doubts. A statement like that, to impressionable girls of twelve years (as my friend and I were that age), to girls who are trying to be the devout followers of Christ...let me just say that it was poison to our souls.
Who is able to analyze our faith and decide if it is genuine?
And so, I had some disagreements with what happened in our worship service last Sunday. As I prepare and deliver the sermon this coming Sunday (our pastor is on vacation), let me be conscience of my words and true to the message of Christ.
Separation of Church and State
There were two things that happened at church on Sunday that made me want to blog. The first of these things has to do with a baptist principle that I hold dear.
Because it was the Sunday before the fifth anniversary of 9/11, the special that the choir sang was called "Song for the Unsung Hero". During part of the song, the worship leader asked the congregation to stand and sing "America the Beautiful". I did not stand; I did not sing. I do not sing patriotic songs during worship service. It is because I discovered an historic baptist principle called Separation of Church and State.
I don't think anyone took notice of my protest. I was sitting in the back, and my son had crawled up in my lap. But it was the principle of the thing that made me remain seated and silent.
When I was in divinity school, the idea behind separation of church and state finally made sense to me. It was because I was studying baptist principles. Growing up, I would have not had a problem with singing a patriotic song during worship. Our Vacation Bible Schools always included the pledge of allegiance to the flag. However, the feeling I get singing patriotic music is similar to the feeling I get when worshiping God. It is just a little too similar.
Lo and behold, come to find out, baptists are the reason that Thomas Jefferson wrote the letter that contained the phrase "separation of church and state." Looking at the history of countries in Europe during and after the Reformation, there is a real sense why things seem so much better when church and state are in separate spheres. I believe that there is a great thing when a country is not going to require you to worship a certain way or pay a special tax if you decide to do your own thing.
I do not force my beliefs on anyone. That doesn't mean that I don't try to evangelize--it just means that I want my actions to speak louder than any display of the Ten Commandments (and I can name them all, thank you). I want my Muslim friend to not be forced to pray a prayer that she does not believe. I want my sons to grow up in a country where they can have Christian beliefs written on their hearts--beliefs that are taught by the church, my husband, and myself.
There is a lot to this issue. But for myself, I am not going to sing patriotic songs in church. Some things are just too sacred to be confused with nationalism.
Because it was the Sunday before the fifth anniversary of 9/11, the special that the choir sang was called "Song for the Unsung Hero". During part of the song, the worship leader asked the congregation to stand and sing "America the Beautiful". I did not stand; I did not sing. I do not sing patriotic songs during worship service. It is because I discovered an historic baptist principle called Separation of Church and State.
I don't think anyone took notice of my protest. I was sitting in the back, and my son had crawled up in my lap. But it was the principle of the thing that made me remain seated and silent.
When I was in divinity school, the idea behind separation of church and state finally made sense to me. It was because I was studying baptist principles. Growing up, I would have not had a problem with singing a patriotic song during worship. Our Vacation Bible Schools always included the pledge of allegiance to the flag. However, the feeling I get singing patriotic music is similar to the feeling I get when worshiping God. It is just a little too similar.
Lo and behold, come to find out, baptists are the reason that Thomas Jefferson wrote the letter that contained the phrase "separation of church and state." Looking at the history of countries in Europe during and after the Reformation, there is a real sense why things seem so much better when church and state are in separate spheres. I believe that there is a great thing when a country is not going to require you to worship a certain way or pay a special tax if you decide to do your own thing.
I do not force my beliefs on anyone. That doesn't mean that I don't try to evangelize--it just means that I want my actions to speak louder than any display of the Ten Commandments (and I can name them all, thank you). I want my Muslim friend to not be forced to pray a prayer that she does not believe. I want my sons to grow up in a country where they can have Christian beliefs written on their hearts--beliefs that are taught by the church, my husband, and myself.
There is a lot to this issue. But for myself, I am not going to sing patriotic songs in church. Some things are just too sacred to be confused with nationalism.
Monday, September 11, 2006
Five Years Ago
No one is really interested in where I was five years ago. My story is not particularly impressive, but I want to share it anyway as my way of remembering 9/11.
I was in divinity school, and I had class on that day. But first I had to go to a staff meeting at the church where I was doing my internship. When I got up and started to get ready, I was listening to the radio and heard that apparently there had been an airplane that crashed into one of the World Trade Center buildings. I was living with my in-laws at the time, and they do not own a television set. So in my mind's eye, I pictured a small plane that had made an error and flown into the building because the radio dj did not elaborate on anything at that point.
Once I got out of the shower a few minutes later, I heard about the second airplane, and I only thought of one word--terrorists. I was on my way to the church when I heard about the Pentagon. And I forget exactly where I was when the news about the Pennsylvania plane crash reached my ears.
During staff meeting, it was obvious that the pastor did not fully comprehend the magnitude of what had happened. He had not seen the images at that time. I hadn't either, but I knew that things were pretty scary anyway.
After staff meeting, our full-time organist and myself went to the youth room where there was a television. When the picture of the World Trade Center came on the screen, we noticed that there was only one building instead of two. It was absolutely incomprehensible. We could not imagine or even begin to imagine how many people would have been in that building when it collapsed. And as we watched, the other tower came down.
Those were the only images I had of the events of 9/11 until after I received my copy of Time later that week. No television at home, I had to rely on the radio that day. I never saw the constant replays of the events or even the footage of the plane hitting the second building.
I called my husband after I returned home. He was 200 miles away because we were living apart as I went to school and did my last semester of intenship. I really wished I could have been with him that day. I called his parents at the restaurant they owned, but they could not fully comprehend the events of that day no matter how my husband or myself told them. They would finally know the scope of 9/11 about three days later because that is when their Chinese language newspaper came in the mail.
I finished up my reading reflection for that day's class. I took my mom out to lunch because her birthday had been the day before, and we often went to lunch on Tuesdays that semester.
At school, people crowded around the television in the lounge. Discussions about the response to the day's events took up all the time in my seminar class. I told my classmates to make sure they at least wrote a journal entry for that day. But what I remember the most is the absolutely perfect weather that we had. It was one of those days in September in North Carolina where the weather remembers that autumn is not too far away. The humidity is low, and the sky is so incredibly blue. And as I looked up, I knew it would stay blue--no airplanes in that sky. It was ironic to think that such a sky was actually threatening to America on that day.
That night, as I lay alone in bed, I listened to the radio. Such unity I had never heard in the response of Congress and other people who were interviewed. I knew that one day I would be telling my own children about that day.
One of my greatest concerns was about my friends. When I realized that terrorists had targeted the United States that morning, my first prayer was for it not to be anyone Chinese. I knew the fallout would be great against whatever race of people that was involved, and I did not want my own family to suffer persecution. After the race of people was determined to be middle eastern, I feared for my friends. One of my friends--a Palastinian Christian--was harrassed that day. She feared for her life. Another friend of Moroccan origin, was afraid too (and even after these five years, she is afraid to admit that she is from Morocco). It was heartbreaking to hear of the violent response that some people committed because of their fear in the days following 9/11.
On Wednesday night, at prayer meeting, our pastor had fully grasped the events of the preceding day. He sang a song for us.
I was in divinity school, and I had class on that day. But first I had to go to a staff meeting at the church where I was doing my internship. When I got up and started to get ready, I was listening to the radio and heard that apparently there had been an airplane that crashed into one of the World Trade Center buildings. I was living with my in-laws at the time, and they do not own a television set. So in my mind's eye, I pictured a small plane that had made an error and flown into the building because the radio dj did not elaborate on anything at that point.
Once I got out of the shower a few minutes later, I heard about the second airplane, and I only thought of one word--terrorists. I was on my way to the church when I heard about the Pentagon. And I forget exactly where I was when the news about the Pennsylvania plane crash reached my ears.
During staff meeting, it was obvious that the pastor did not fully comprehend the magnitude of what had happened. He had not seen the images at that time. I hadn't either, but I knew that things were pretty scary anyway.
After staff meeting, our full-time organist and myself went to the youth room where there was a television. When the picture of the World Trade Center came on the screen, we noticed that there was only one building instead of two. It was absolutely incomprehensible. We could not imagine or even begin to imagine how many people would have been in that building when it collapsed. And as we watched, the other tower came down.
Those were the only images I had of the events of 9/11 until after I received my copy of Time later that week. No television at home, I had to rely on the radio that day. I never saw the constant replays of the events or even the footage of the plane hitting the second building.
I called my husband after I returned home. He was 200 miles away because we were living apart as I went to school and did my last semester of intenship. I really wished I could have been with him that day. I called his parents at the restaurant they owned, but they could not fully comprehend the events of that day no matter how my husband or myself told them. They would finally know the scope of 9/11 about three days later because that is when their Chinese language newspaper came in the mail.
I finished up my reading reflection for that day's class. I took my mom out to lunch because her birthday had been the day before, and we often went to lunch on Tuesdays that semester.
At school, people crowded around the television in the lounge. Discussions about the response to the day's events took up all the time in my seminar class. I told my classmates to make sure they at least wrote a journal entry for that day. But what I remember the most is the absolutely perfect weather that we had. It was one of those days in September in North Carolina where the weather remembers that autumn is not too far away. The humidity is low, and the sky is so incredibly blue. And as I looked up, I knew it would stay blue--no airplanes in that sky. It was ironic to think that such a sky was actually threatening to America on that day.
That night, as I lay alone in bed, I listened to the radio. Such unity I had never heard in the response of Congress and other people who were interviewed. I knew that one day I would be telling my own children about that day.
One of my greatest concerns was about my friends. When I realized that terrorists had targeted the United States that morning, my first prayer was for it not to be anyone Chinese. I knew the fallout would be great against whatever race of people that was involved, and I did not want my own family to suffer persecution. After the race of people was determined to be middle eastern, I feared for my friends. One of my friends--a Palastinian Christian--was harrassed that day. She feared for her life. Another friend of Moroccan origin, was afraid too (and even after these five years, she is afraid to admit that she is from Morocco). It was heartbreaking to hear of the violent response that some people committed because of their fear in the days following 9/11.
On Wednesday night, at prayer meeting, our pastor had fully grasped the events of the preceding day. He sang a song for us.
Be still, my soul: the Lord is on thy side.
Bear patiently the cross of grief or pain.
Leave to thy God to order and provide;
In every change, He faithful will remain.
Be still, my soul: thy best, thy heavenly Friend
Through thorny ways leads to a joyful end.
Be still, my soul: thy God doth undertake
To guide the future, as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul: the waves and winds still know
His voice Who ruled them while He dwelt below.
Be still, my soul: the hour is hastening on
When we shall be forever with the Lord.
When disappointment, grief and fear are gone,
Sorrow forgot, love’s purest joys restored.
Be still, my soul: when change and tears are past
All safe and blessèd we shall meet at last.
"Be Still, My Soul"
by Katharina A. von Schlegel
trans. Jane L. Borthwick
Friday, September 08, 2006
Fairly Simple Friday Five
Name five things you have enjoyed this week.
1. I attended the first worship service for a new church that started on Sunday.
2. On Thursday, both of my kids took naps and were not in cranky moods by the evening. That left me with a peaceful evening (in which I did not have to resort to tears myself).
3. Wonderful comments have been left for my blog postings. I like comments.
4. My oldest son takes his lunch to preschool this year, and he eats all the food I pack. It has been good to get him back on a school routine this week.
5. My youngest son started Kindermusik again today. It is great to have that one-on-one time with him.
Bonus: A good thing coming up this weekend is my SIL is returning from a medical trip to Nicaragua. I always enjoy seeing her, and I get to see her when she comes home late Saturday.
1. I attended the first worship service for a new church that started on Sunday.
2. On Thursday, both of my kids took naps and were not in cranky moods by the evening. That left me with a peaceful evening (in which I did not have to resort to tears myself).
3. Wonderful comments have been left for my blog postings. I like comments.
4. My oldest son takes his lunch to preschool this year, and he eats all the food I pack. It has been good to get him back on a school routine this week.
5. My youngest son started Kindermusik again today. It is great to have that one-on-one time with him.
Bonus: A good thing coming up this weekend is my SIL is returning from a medical trip to Nicaragua. I always enjoy seeing her, and I get to see her when she comes home late Saturday.
Wednesday, September 06, 2006
Happy Meal Toys
According to some people, putting Hummers in Happy Meal toys is a bad idea. I think it is worse to make the parent choose between the boy Happy Meal and girl Happy Meal. My son never wants the boy Happy Meal anyway. As we go through the drive-thru and order, he pitches a fit from the back seat, screaming, "I want the girl toy!!" So we didn't end up with any of the Hummers. Instead, both my sons have been playing with the Polly Pocket Happy Meals. I liked them better, too.
Of course, the Hummer/Polly Pockets Happy Meals were last month. Now the Happy Meals feature Super Mario.
(I'm waiting for Neopets to be in the Happy Meal again because I am such a Neopets addict.)
Tuesday, September 05, 2006
New Church
On Sunday, I attended a brand new church. One of the members of my church has been led to start a church in another section of our county. She heard my testimony and asked me to share my story. So I went to that first service.
We met on a corner of a basketball court in a community center. There were about 20 there. And God was there, too.
We met on a corner of a basketball court in a community center. There were about 20 there. And God was there, too.
Friday, September 01, 2006
Friday Five: life in the fast lane
1. Driving: an enjoyable way to clear the mind? a means to an end? a chance to be quiet with one's thoughts? a necessary evil? the downfall of our planet and its fossil fuels? Discuss.
Driving is enjoyable when the kids are not screaming in the backseat. This usually means that my youngest is asleep, and my oldest has the headphones on and is watching a dvd.
2. Do you drive the speed limit? A little faster? Slower? Have you ever gotten a ticket?
I rarely drive over the speed limit; and if I do, it is only 5 mph over. I have never gotten a ticket in my 13 years of driving. *knock on wood*
3. Do you take public transportation? When? What's your opinion of the experience?
I don't live near a busline. And since I don't have a job, I don't need to commute just yet. I do remember taking the bus to the mall when I was in college. I went with a bunch of international students, and we were Christmas shopping. It was a great way to spend the afternoon, and we didn't have to worry about parking.
4. Complete this sentence: _____________ has the worst drivers I've ever experienced.
Egypt. They pay no attention to where the lanes are. It is a free-for-all. Also, Taiwan--you ought to see them make left turns.
In the US, I would say Philadelphia.
5. According to the Census Bureau, reverendmother's fair city has the 6th longest average commute in the United States at 29 minutes each way. How does your personal commute rate?
No job equals no commute. My dh's commute is about 25 minutes one way if he leaves early. It can stretch out to 45 minutes one way if he leaves a little too late.
Bonus for the brutally honest: It has been said, and the MythBusters have confirmed, that cell phones can impede driving ability almost as much as drinking. Do you talk on a cell phone while driving?
I have talked on a cellphone while driving, but not very often. I usually look for a place to pull over if I get a call though. My van came equipped with a hands-free phone to use, but I have not put any minutes on it to use it.
A couple of months ago, I was talking on my cellphone and driving on the interstate when a car didn't check before pulling into my lane. I immediately dropped the cell into my lap while I dealt with the very rude and obnoxious person's mistake. (Thankfully, we did not get into a wreck--I've never had one of those either. *knock on wood again*)
Driving is enjoyable when the kids are not screaming in the backseat. This usually means that my youngest is asleep, and my oldest has the headphones on and is watching a dvd.
2. Do you drive the speed limit? A little faster? Slower? Have you ever gotten a ticket?
I rarely drive over the speed limit; and if I do, it is only 5 mph over. I have never gotten a ticket in my 13 years of driving. *knock on wood*
3. Do you take public transportation? When? What's your opinion of the experience?
I don't live near a busline. And since I don't have a job, I don't need to commute just yet. I do remember taking the bus to the mall when I was in college. I went with a bunch of international students, and we were Christmas shopping. It was a great way to spend the afternoon, and we didn't have to worry about parking.
4. Complete this sentence: _____________ has the worst drivers I've ever experienced.
Egypt. They pay no attention to where the lanes are. It is a free-for-all. Also, Taiwan--you ought to see them make left turns.
In the US, I would say Philadelphia.
5. According to the Census Bureau, reverendmother's fair city has the 6th longest average commute in the United States at 29 minutes each way. How does your personal commute rate?
No job equals no commute. My dh's commute is about 25 minutes one way if he leaves early. It can stretch out to 45 minutes one way if he leaves a little too late.
Bonus for the brutally honest: It has been said, and the MythBusters have confirmed, that cell phones can impede driving ability almost as much as drinking. Do you talk on a cell phone while driving?
I have talked on a cellphone while driving, but not very often. I usually look for a place to pull over if I get a call though. My van came equipped with a hands-free phone to use, but I have not put any minutes on it to use it.
A couple of months ago, I was talking on my cellphone and driving on the interstate when a car didn't check before pulling into my lane. I immediately dropped the cell into my lap while I dealt with the very rude and obnoxious person's mistake. (Thankfully, we did not get into a wreck--I've never had one of those either. *knock on wood again*)
Sunday, August 27, 2006
My Testimony
This morning, I gave the mission moment at our church. The sermon was on one of the shared values of our church. This value states that, "We believe in the freedom of the local church under the authority of Jesus Christ to shape its own life and mission, call its own leadership, and ordain whom it perceives as gifted for ministry, male or female." I gave the story of my call to ministry. I have reposted that testimony here--changing names of entities and people to protect the innocent and to help maintain a little bit of privacy.
During the service, as our pastor firmly asserted that women can be called to ministry (sermon title was "Of Course You Can"), a couple got up and stomped out of our sanctuary. The church is located in the same town as a prominent, conservative, baptist seminary. No doubt that there will be some issue with our church because of what was said today.
My Testimony
Throughout my life, I have been strongly aware of and in tune with spiritual things. From the time I was a baby until I went away to college, I went to a rural, baptist church at least three times a week. My mother made sure that I went to church and participated fully in the activities there. So when I tell people of how I became a Christian, I have to admit that it was a gradual occurrence. There was not a specific moment where I know I accepted Christ, but rather it was a growing realization that led me to commit my life to Christ. I did this at a baptist camp when I was eight years old.
Having been active in Mission Friends, GAs, and Acteens (all baptist mission education programs), I have always been aware of the need for evangelizing lost peoples. By age 12, I had come to the awareness that I would like to be involved in some type of vocational ministry to win the lost to Christ. Like my conversion, it was a gradual calling to ministry. As I went through my high school years, I thought I would become a missionary. The summer before I was a senior in high school, I attended the Youth Theology Institute sponsored by Candler School of Theology. While there, one of the areas of ministry we focused on was ministry within our communities, and I realized that God could use me as a missionary in any community in which I was placed. I no longer focused on becoming a missionary; instead, I started to think of becoming a minister.
Even before I was accepted to college for my undergraduate degree, I knew that I would attend the School of Divinity at G___. The divinity school was just getting started, and my dad had heard this about the school. He knew that I felt called to ministry, and he mentioned it to me. I had a sense that I would attend divinity school at G___ from that day. After receiving my BA in religion, I applied to the divinity school and was accepted. I received my Masters of Divinity in May 2002.
While at G___, there were certain classes that were required by every divinity student, and one of those classes was on preaching and worship. Each person in the class had to prepare a sermon and deliver it. I really struggled with this task. Writing the sermon was not that difficult using the preaching professor's method that we followed, but the actual delivery of it was what seemed difficult to me. I knew that I was not a public speaker, and it caused me a great deal of stress in the days leading up to my delivery day. However, once I got up to deliver my sermon, I felt such a presence of the Holy Spirit that I became calm. There is something about realizing that a sermon is God-directed. To feel the Holy Spirit work through me in the sermon helped me to realize the next step in my call to ministry.
When I enrolled in divinity school, I did not have a specific area of ministry in mind. I chose to take a variety of courses while in divinity school to see what area I liked best, and I felt that area would be my focus. After taking the preaching course, I reflected on the experience of writing a sermon. Given all the struggles that I had with delivering the sermon, I came to realize that writing—and, yes!—delivering the sermon had been an enjoyable experience. We teach our children to do something they enjoy for their vocation, and suddenly I realized what I enjoyed doing. Through my personal reflection of this class, I began to suspect that I was called to preach.
Since I knew of the struggles of baptist women preachers, I prayed for over a year about this call to preach. Throughout that time, I really listened for God. It seems like every sermon I heard affirmed this call (and some of those preachers I heard would not support a woman preacher). After about a year, I began telling a few close friends that I felt called to preach.
I truly believe that I can be a minister wherever I am. As a child of God, I am called to minister everyday. I have committed myself to that goal, whether paid or not.
Today, it is easy to get discouraged. I have a stack of rejection letters if anyone is interested in seeing them. Women who are called to preach in all Protestant denominations still struggle. (If you don’t believe me, check out the next blog entry where I posted an article about this topic from yesterday’s New York Times.) When dh and I moved to this area two years ago, I began looking for a church congregation by emailing pastors. In my email, I was most interested in knowing if the congregation supported women who find themselves called to ministry, even called to preach. And here I am. I have found encouragement in this church called H____ Baptist Church, and for that I am grateful.
I am proud to be a member of a church that will not send my son mixed messages about gender and the call to ministry. I am proud to be part of a church that encourages every member to be a minister to those around them. I am proud to be part of a community of faith where I am allowed to use my gifts. There is no limit to what God can do.
When I was asked to preach at a church six weeks ago, I sat my ds down a few days before Sunday and told him that Daddy would take him to Sunday School and church because I would be attending a different church. He looked at me for a moment and asked why (a very common question for ds nowadays). I told him it was because I was going to preach at another church. Then, after a pause, I said, “I am a preacher.” When I say that to adults, I have to explain myself a lot—especially if they know I am Baptist or they are Baptist themselves. So I forgot that I was dealing with a 3 year old in this case. DS looked at me for a moment. No look of shock on his face. No questions of how could it be that I am a preacher. He didn’t try to argue that I couldn’t be a preacher because I was just a mom. There was just one statement: I want to be a preacher, too.
During the service, as our pastor firmly asserted that women can be called to ministry (sermon title was "Of Course You Can"), a couple got up and stomped out of our sanctuary. The church is located in the same town as a prominent, conservative, baptist seminary. No doubt that there will be some issue with our church because of what was said today.
My Testimony
Throughout my life, I have been strongly aware of and in tune with spiritual things. From the time I was a baby until I went away to college, I went to a rural, baptist church at least three times a week. My mother made sure that I went to church and participated fully in the activities there. So when I tell people of how I became a Christian, I have to admit that it was a gradual occurrence. There was not a specific moment where I know I accepted Christ, but rather it was a growing realization that led me to commit my life to Christ. I did this at a baptist camp when I was eight years old.
Having been active in Mission Friends, GAs, and Acteens (all baptist mission education programs), I have always been aware of the need for evangelizing lost peoples. By age 12, I had come to the awareness that I would like to be involved in some type of vocational ministry to win the lost to Christ. Like my conversion, it was a gradual calling to ministry. As I went through my high school years, I thought I would become a missionary. The summer before I was a senior in high school, I attended the Youth Theology Institute sponsored by Candler School of Theology. While there, one of the areas of ministry we focused on was ministry within our communities, and I realized that God could use me as a missionary in any community in which I was placed. I no longer focused on becoming a missionary; instead, I started to think of becoming a minister.
Even before I was accepted to college for my undergraduate degree, I knew that I would attend the School of Divinity at G___. The divinity school was just getting started, and my dad had heard this about the school. He knew that I felt called to ministry, and he mentioned it to me. I had a sense that I would attend divinity school at G___ from that day. After receiving my BA in religion, I applied to the divinity school and was accepted. I received my Masters of Divinity in May 2002.
While at G___, there were certain classes that were required by every divinity student, and one of those classes was on preaching and worship. Each person in the class had to prepare a sermon and deliver it. I really struggled with this task. Writing the sermon was not that difficult using the preaching professor's method that we followed, but the actual delivery of it was what seemed difficult to me. I knew that I was not a public speaker, and it caused me a great deal of stress in the days leading up to my delivery day. However, once I got up to deliver my sermon, I felt such a presence of the Holy Spirit that I became calm. There is something about realizing that a sermon is God-directed. To feel the Holy Spirit work through me in the sermon helped me to realize the next step in my call to ministry.
When I enrolled in divinity school, I did not have a specific area of ministry in mind. I chose to take a variety of courses while in divinity school to see what area I liked best, and I felt that area would be my focus. After taking the preaching course, I reflected on the experience of writing a sermon. Given all the struggles that I had with delivering the sermon, I came to realize that writing—and, yes!—delivering the sermon had been an enjoyable experience. We teach our children to do something they enjoy for their vocation, and suddenly I realized what I enjoyed doing. Through my personal reflection of this class, I began to suspect that I was called to preach.
Since I knew of the struggles of baptist women preachers, I prayed for over a year about this call to preach. Throughout that time, I really listened for God. It seems like every sermon I heard affirmed this call (and some of those preachers I heard would not support a woman preacher). After about a year, I began telling a few close friends that I felt called to preach.
I truly believe that I can be a minister wherever I am. As a child of God, I am called to minister everyday. I have committed myself to that goal, whether paid or not.
Today, it is easy to get discouraged. I have a stack of rejection letters if anyone is interested in seeing them. Women who are called to preach in all Protestant denominations still struggle. (If you don’t believe me, check out the next blog entry where I posted an article about this topic from yesterday’s New York Times.) When dh and I moved to this area two years ago, I began looking for a church congregation by emailing pastors. In my email, I was most interested in knowing if the congregation supported women who find themselves called to ministry, even called to preach. And here I am. I have found encouragement in this church called H____ Baptist Church, and for that I am grateful.
I am proud to be a member of a church that will not send my son mixed messages about gender and the call to ministry. I am proud to be part of a church that encourages every member to be a minister to those around them. I am proud to be part of a community of faith where I am allowed to use my gifts. There is no limit to what God can do.
When I was asked to preach at a church six weeks ago, I sat my ds down a few days before Sunday and told him that Daddy would take him to Sunday School and church because I would be attending a different church. He looked at me for a moment and asked why (a very common question for ds nowadays). I told him it was because I was going to preach at another church. Then, after a pause, I said, “I am a preacher.” When I say that to adults, I have to explain myself a lot—especially if they know I am Baptist or they are Baptist themselves. So I forgot that I was dealing with a 3 year old in this case. DS looked at me for a moment. No look of shock on his face. No questions of how could it be that I am a preacher. He didn’t try to argue that I couldn’t be a preacher because I was just a mom. There was just one statement: I want to be a preacher, too.
Article Worth Reading
So I'm not alone in feeling rejected by churches and in struggling to find a place of ministry. Here is an article I ran across today about women in ministry.
Clergywomen Find Hard Path to Bigger Pulpit
Oh, Lord, help me not to grow bitter. Amen.
Clergywomen Find Hard Path to Bigger Pulpit
Oh, Lord, help me not to grow bitter. Amen.
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
Grief and the Internet
One of my friends recently passed away. The strange thing is that I have never met this friend--at least, not in real life. She was someone who I only knew through our messages to one another over the internet. I don't know what her voice sounded like. I don't know how she hugged. I don't know what her mannerisms were.
But I do know that she was an encourager. When I felt like my call to ministry was not worth it, she was the first to send me messages of support. She even told me about this new webring of women in ministry (and supporters of women in ministry). I started blogging because of this woman.
Now I wonder: how does society adapt to greiving over someone you have never physically met? How is internet grief handled? Has anyone written a book about this yet? How do we express condolences?
Just some questions floating around in my mind, I guess. Along with some grief.
But I do know that she was an encourager. When I felt like my call to ministry was not worth it, she was the first to send me messages of support. She even told me about this new webring of women in ministry (and supporters of women in ministry). I started blogging because of this woman.
Now I wonder: how does society adapt to greiving over someone you have never physically met? How is internet grief handled? Has anyone written a book about this yet? How do we express condolences?
Just some questions floating around in my mind, I guess. Along with some grief.
Saturday, July 22, 2006
Not Going to Happen
How do you blog when you have a little boy who has reached the apex of separation anxiety? He is also in pain from tooth number eight, and he is dropping a nap from his schedule.
"Mama, pick me up!!!"
I have lots of thoughts that I could blog about--job interview, end-times, etc. But it isn't going to happen right now.
"Mama, pick me up!!!"
I have lots of thoughts that I could blog about--job interview, end-times, etc. But it isn't going to happen right now.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
I Want to be a Preacher, Too
Tonight, I have told my 3 year old son that I will not be going to church with him on Sunday. Daddy will have to take him. I am going to another church to preach for a pastor who is on vacation. The last time I preached it was November 2004, and it was for my church; so my son doesn’t quite realize that I will be working on Sunday.
My son has always asked me where people worked. He will go through the whole family, and I will tell them the name of the company where said family member works. When he asks where mama works, I tell him “home.” So now he is confused by this new work I will be doing this weekend.
I also said the words aloud to him—I am a preacher. My son looked at me. He didn’t get confused, but he didn’t say anything. I told him that boys and girls can be preachers when they grow up. He understands what a preacher is because of his church experience. Suddenly, he knows that mommy may have another role in life. I told him that I went to school to learn to be a preacher. I hope he knows I can be a mommy, too. He doesn’t say much about this new role. I think he is trying to understand how it affects him.
After about five minutes, my son says, “I want to be a preacher, too.”
Thursday, June 29, 2006
Those Rowdy Kids
Ever wonder about those rowdy kids in your congregation? Think they will grow up to be no good? When you tell them to behave, do you think that it is all they will remember about you 20 years later?
My grandmother died on Christmas Eve. After the service at the gravesite, one of the godly matriarchs of the church approached me. This church is the one in which I grew up: Baptist, conservative, rural, and small. This woman was concerned that the only image I had of her was of the time I was twisting up the curtains in a Sunday School classroom, and she sternly told me to stop. I was a bit taken aback. I had to search my memory a long time to even remember the incident; indeed, my recollection may be entirely lost now. Yet it has been a worry of this woman for 25 years.
Let me tell you what I remember about this woman.
She is the one that was always in charge of the mission groups at our church. Our focus on missions at Christmas and Easter were led by her. She encouraged me to do mission action projects. Even after interest among my peers had waned, she was the one who encouraged me to do another level of Acteens (a mission group for teenage girls in which you complete levels of service). This woman was truly one of the saints in that church when I was younger.
But I wonder if the only way she remembers me is as that little girl twisting up the curtains. After six months of wondering, I am beginning to believe that I will write her a letter and tell her that there is so much more that I remember.
Because of her, I took a special interest in missions. Because of that interest in missions, I felt called to the ministry. Because of that call, I went to divinity school for my Masters of Divinity. Because I went to divinity school, I had to take a preaching class. Because of that preaching class, I found out that I love to preach. Should this little, curtain-twisting girl dare to call herself a pastor?
For what it is worth, even the little children in our churches have a perception of older members. They learn through our actions and our teachings. They may not remember a one-time scolding 25 years later; but hopefully, we can plant a seed in their hearts that helps lead them to God.
Tuesday, June 27, 2006
Small Town Newspaper Articles
I was perusing a daily newspaper from one county over from my hometown. There are a couple of articles about women in ministry.
Here is the first: Balancing Ministry and Family.
And the second one: Women and the Church. I went to Gardner-Webb Divinity School, and Beverly was in some of my classes while we were both getting our M.Div degrees. It is a thrill to see her as the first female D.Min. to graduate from that divinity school.
Here is the first: Balancing Ministry and Family.
And the second one: Women and the Church. I went to Gardner-Webb Divinity School, and Beverly was in some of my classes while we were both getting our M.Div degrees. It is a thrill to see her as the first female D.Min. to graduate from that divinity school.
Monday, June 26, 2006
State of Women in Baptist Life 2005
Baptist Women in Ministry has a paper that was presented last week entitled "Assessing the State of Women in Baptist Life". The link to the paper is on their website: Baptist Women in Ministry.
Saturday, June 24, 2006
Friday Five Ice Cream Discussion
The RevGalBlogPals Friday Five is about ice cream this week. Here is my response.
1. Ice cream: for warm weather only or a year-round food?
Ice cream is a year-round, everyday food. I prefer to eat it in the winter particularily on the coldest day of the year (no joke).
2. Favorite flavor(s)
My favorite is actually frozen custard bought from Goodberry’s here in NC. They have a flavored custard, and you can mix in a concrete. My favorite is vanilla with peanut butter fudge mixed in (although I have been getting marshmallows mixed in of late). My favorite store-bought ice cream is Breyer’s Brownie Mud Pie.
3. Cake cone, sugar cone, waffle cone, cup?
All of the above. I usually get a cup because I know if I get a cone, my 3 year old will want one, too—and that would be a mess for me to clean up.
4. Childhood ice-cream memory
Eating Breyer’s vanilla ice cream and softening it up in the microwave for 5 seconds because we wanted it more like soft serve.
5. Banana splits: discuss.
We used to get banana split parties in grade school for making the honor roll. Banana splits have usually been out of my price range at the ice cream shop; however, my husband wants to investigate this Jr. Banana Split that is available for 99 cents at Sonic. That might be my weekend goal.
Bonus Question: What are the ingredients/steps for making an ice cream soda?
I have no idea how to make an ice cream soda. I would eat the ice cream and drink the soda separately.
Wednesday, June 21, 2006
Enthusiasm
I was very angry with myself on Monday night. It has nothing to do with ministry. It has every thing to do with the Stanley Cup Final game that was played on that night.
I knew when I woke up on Monday that I had to watch the game. It was
And I missed it.
Somewhere on Monday, I ended up having to deal with a ravenous three-year-old (who is certainly going through a growth spurt as he eats SO much for a preschooler), and I also had to deal with an eleven-month-old (who is getting tooth number eight). And my husband worked late. By the time the hubby came home, I was sprinting toward the finish line and putting the kids to bed. It had been a long day. And then the younger one wanted to stay up a little. The game had already started. Finally, I was able to nurse him to sleep…and then I fell asleep, too.
Ahhhhhhh! I woke up at 11:30 PM--after the game had finished and the trophy was presented. I could not help but fall asleep, but why didn't my husband wake me? I am angry at myself for sleeping, and yet I don't know what else I could have done. I had been exhausted all day--taking the kids to the pool (by myself), following the younger son time and time again as he practices climbing the stairs, listening to the older one talk non-stop about everything that goes on in his day.
I cried over missing the game. I had so much invested by watching the previous games. It felt like it was time wasted. I could read about what happened in the game. I could see the highlights from the game. I could watch the parade and celebration the day after. But something doesn’t feel right. I have lost the enthusiasm. How much better it would have been to have actually watched the game!
And it makes me wonder if the people who actually saw Jesus—saw his miracles, listened to his radical teachings, followed him—had so much more enthusiasm than I have for Jesus. Sure, they may not have known everything about Jesus because all was being revealed during that time. They didn’t know the final score of the big game, but they were there to watch it. I suspect that I could have a lot more enthusiasm for what God is doing in my own life. I have the written account of God’s dealings with man. I can see the evidence of the church in my world. Could there be more enthusiasm? I bet so.
It is time to marvel at this gift of salvation. It is our undeserved trophy. For like the people of
Saturday, June 17, 2006
RevGalBlogPals Friday FiveZzzz (about sleep)
1. In what kind of environment do you sleep best? (e.g. amount of light and noise, temperature, number of pillows, breathe-right strip, sleeping in the buff, etc.)
I sleep whenever I am still. It takes me less than five minutes to fall asleep. If I awaken, I go back to sleep. With two kids, I have learned to sleep whenever I can. I can sleep with the light on. I can sleep with my kids playing in the room. I can sleep when it is cool or warm. I usually use a pillow, but I do not requre one.
2. How much sleep do you need to feel consistently well-rested?
How much can you get by on?
What are the consequences when you don't get enough?
To be well-rested, I think nine hours is best. However, I cannot say when the last time was that I got nine hours (before kids for sure). I can get by on three or four hours. When I don't get enough sleep, my oldest kid knows that mommy is grumpy that day and may fall asleep while watching television at some point in the late morning or early afternoon.
3. Night owl or morning person?
I am definitely a night owl--why else would I be typing this at 12:48 AM?!? I have always been a night owl.
4. Favorite cure for insomnia
What insomnia??
5. To snooze or not to snooze? Why or why not?
I never snooze. I have kids who wake me up in the morning and makes enough noise until mommy is up.
I sleep whenever I am still. It takes me less than five minutes to fall asleep. If I awaken, I go back to sleep. With two kids, I have learned to sleep whenever I can. I can sleep with the light on. I can sleep with my kids playing in the room. I can sleep when it is cool or warm. I usually use a pillow, but I do not requre one.
2. How much sleep do you need to feel consistently well-rested?
How much can you get by on?
What are the consequences when you don't get enough?
To be well-rested, I think nine hours is best. However, I cannot say when the last time was that I got nine hours (before kids for sure). I can get by on three or four hours. When I don't get enough sleep, my oldest kid knows that mommy is grumpy that day and may fall asleep while watching television at some point in the late morning or early afternoon.
3. Night owl or morning person?
I am definitely a night owl--why else would I be typing this at 12:48 AM?!? I have always been a night owl.
4. Favorite cure for insomnia
What insomnia??
5. To snooze or not to snooze? Why or why not?
I never snooze. I have kids who wake me up in the morning and makes enough noise until mommy is up.
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