I was very angry with myself on Monday night. It has nothing to do with ministry. It has every thing to do with the Stanley Cup Final game that was played on that night.
I knew when I woke up on Monday that I had to watch the game. It was
And I missed it.
Somewhere on Monday, I ended up having to deal with a ravenous three-year-old (who is certainly going through a growth spurt as he eats SO much for a preschooler), and I also had to deal with an eleven-month-old (who is getting tooth number eight). And my husband worked late. By the time the hubby came home, I was sprinting toward the finish line and putting the kids to bed. It had been a long day. And then the younger one wanted to stay up a little. The game had already started. Finally, I was able to nurse him to sleep…and then I fell asleep, too.
Ahhhhhhh! I woke up at 11:30 PM--after the game had finished and the trophy was presented. I could not help but fall asleep, but why didn't my husband wake me? I am angry at myself for sleeping, and yet I don't know what else I could have done. I had been exhausted all day--taking the kids to the pool (by myself), following the younger son time and time again as he practices climbing the stairs, listening to the older one talk non-stop about everything that goes on in his day.
I cried over missing the game. I had so much invested by watching the previous games. It felt like it was time wasted. I could read about what happened in the game. I could see the highlights from the game. I could watch the parade and celebration the day after. But something doesn’t feel right. I have lost the enthusiasm. How much better it would have been to have actually watched the game!
And it makes me wonder if the people who actually saw Jesus—saw his miracles, listened to his radical teachings, followed him—had so much more enthusiasm than I have for Jesus. Sure, they may not have known everything about Jesus because all was being revealed during that time. They didn’t know the final score of the big game, but they were there to watch it. I suspect that I could have a lot more enthusiasm for what God is doing in my own life. I have the written account of God’s dealings with man. I can see the evidence of the church in my world. Could there be more enthusiasm? I bet so.
It is time to marvel at this gift of salvation. It is our undeserved trophy. For like the people of
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