Wow!

I was feeling rather sad today. I don't know why except maybe it is my hormone level changing, and I will be in labor soon (*crosses fingers*). At 38 weeks and 3 days, that is a possibility.

I almost didn't go to my small group meeting tonight. Until one of the members called and told me there were gifts. While I do not need anything specifically for baby #3, I was curious about presents. So I went and stayed for the meeting.

After the meeting, the group prayed for me. They did the laying on of hands thing, too. It was the first time a group had ever done that for me. And it is making me reflect one word--Wow!

The weight of the hands on me as the group prayed for me and my #3 offered me a lot of comfort. It reminded me of how God is putting protection all around me for this impending delivery. And no matter what the future may hold, I will trust that my path is known by my God.

It was a good "wow!" experience for today. And it almost didn't happen.

Thirty-six weeks

I have entered the ninth month of pregnancy. And my life feels like it is coming apart. So I'll take it one day at a time.

I am beautiful. I am not lazy. I am not a loser.

I have a woman's strength for this life. I will make the most of myself. I refuse to be blamed for other people's failures and shortcomings.

Wherever God leads me, that is where I will go. I will have the courage to make God my priority and go to do the task that God has given me.

Amen.

So Helpful

My 2 1/2 year old son is so helpful when I am using my computer printer. He always rushes to get the paper and hand it to me.

When the paper is 12 pages long, the pages sometimes get out of order...and a little wrinkled.

Pro-immigration

Yes, I support immigration to the United States. It is a personal thing. Along the lines of what is said in this video:

First-Born vs. All Others

There was an interesting article in the newspaper this past week about how parents spend more time with first-born children than their later-born siblings. I concede that is true. I do my best to spend time with my second-born, but sometimes I have to listen to his older brother read to me or help him with his homework (preschool homework--so nothing too tedious yet).

Now, with number three child kicking my internal organs all day long, I wonder how much of my time this child will get. This baby will be carted around as his/her brothers have activities and school to attend. But there will be individual time for him/her, too. I think articles like this can make a parent feel guilty, but I have refused to feel that way. I do the best I can, and that is all I am asked to do.

But it is curious to think about.

When I was pregnant with my first son, I had the baby crib and changing table purchased by the time I was 4 months pregnant. I had everything ready long before he was born--which was good since he was a couple of weeks early.

With his brother, I had the crib and baby clothes sorted out by the time I was six months pregnant.

Yesterday, I finally got the crib mattress raised and the baby clothes sorted out (but not washed yet) for this new addition. I am 34 weeks pregnant--8 1/2 months. And I need to at least buy one pack of newborn diapers, right? Maybe he/she will need a baby book, too--one that probably will not be written in very much.

Woe to you, second and third borns! You get gypped, I know. But at least you will always have that older sibling to imitate and get in trouble.

But you also have a mother and father who have been through this before. They know not to pick you up out of the crib if you aren't crying. They know feeding cues better. They are less apt to make mistakes in the early days of no sleep.

Whatever happens, I guarantee that this life will be interesting.

Happy New Year

It is the first Sunday of Advent, so it is the Church New Year today. So, Happy New Year!

Angry

This article in the Charlotte newspaper makes me want to spit nails. I cannot decide if I am more angry because I am pro-breastfeeding or because I am pro-immigration; but if this is the way we do things in this country, I am definitely not proud.


Update: Nursing Mother Reunited with Son

First Trimester Absence

In mid-August, I started feeling really tired all the time. I gave at a blood drive about that time, and I remember thinking that all my energy had left me with that pint of blood.

The first Saturday of September I knew the real reason: I was pregnant.

For the first 13 weeks of this pregnancy, I was nothing. I was so incredibly tired every single day. I was ravenously hungry when I was awake. And at the same time, I was nauseated, too. Three hour naps every afternoon were the only ways I could escape the hunger and nausea.

I resigned from the church I was serving at the end of September. At that point, with the way I felt, I could not keep up with all the activity that was scheduled.

I hoped that the nausea would not follow me for six months as it had when I was pregnant with my first child. I hoped it would not last five months like it did when I was pregnant with my second child.

Then, a week and a half ago, at 13 weeks and 2 days, the nausea vanished. My energy level rose. I still need a lot of sleep at night, but I haven't napped in the afternoon for two weeks now.

There are other pains to deal with though. I had to find maternity pants to wear when I was only 10 weeks along! I have a lot of stretching, and it is very uncomfortable when I sleep (even with my body pillow to help).

My due date is May 8.

Discussion Questions for High School Musical 2

This is a list of questions that I developed from the movie and used with my youth.

If you haven't seen the movie, there may be some spoiler things here; so read at your own discretion.

1. From the very beginning of the movie, there is an anticipation of things to come (i.e. summer, car, talent show, college, kiss, etc). What are the good things about anticipation? What are the negatives?
   

2. High School Musical hinted that Sharpay was wealthy. Here we see the evidence that she is. How does Sharpay’s wealth influence her? How does it affect her relationships?
   

3. Jesus told a parable about a wise man and a foolish man building their houses. Sharpay builds her performance at the talent show around Troy. What happens when Troy pulls out of the talent show?
   

4. Does Sharpay redeem herself by the end of the movie?

5. How does jealousy play a part in this movie?
   

6. Do you agree that Troy is a “good guy”? Why or why not?
   

7. How do you respond when someone tells you that you are “not one of us”?
   

8. What do you do when your friends show you things that they have and you do not possess?
   

9. What is the “music in you”?
   

10. What/Who is the right foundation for your life? How does it affect the way you live?

Today is the Day

High School Musical 2!!!

My sons and I have been waiting for this for quite a while.

And....

...we slept in!! My 4 year old DID NOT want to go to an unfamiliar church. And the room we stay in at my MIL's house is like a cave anyway because shady trees keep it dark.

I slept so good in that room this weekend. I will not tell you what time we got up because I haven't slept in like that post-children. Amazing that I could get the boys to sleep just as long without a peep from either of them.

Or maybe that was their grandparents wearing them out and keeping them from napping the whole weekend.

Thoughts at 3:30 AM

This coming weekend, I will be taking the boys to see their grandparents. All four grandparents live in the same area--within 25 minutes of each other. So it is easy to see them throughout the days that we are in town.

We will be there on Sunday. I have been thinking about going to the church where I grew up, the church that my mother still attends. But what if the preacher decides to rant about women in ministry? He has been known to rant about Muslims, Catholics, abortionists, etc. I'm sure women preachers must be on his list, too.

If the preacher were to decide to verbally attack women preachers, what would I do? Would I laugh at the irony? Would I get up and leave the service then and there? Would I scrunch down in my seat and hide? Would I stand up and shout?

Strange thoughts to be having at 3:30 AM. I stayed up too late trying to finish the ironing for this week. Ironing always gets me to thinking--my best sermon points occur when I am using an iron.

I do find it strange, however, that a church would teach its girls about God, about the love of Christ, about the call to evangelize; teaching them in Sunday School, in Mission Friends, in GAs, in Acteens only to be surprised when one of those girls decides to take seriously what she has been taught. I am a product of my upbringing. If I had never known that country church, I don't know if I would be in ministry today.

Such irony abounds.

I wonder if I will attend that church, another church, or just take the opportunity to sleep in for one Sunday. Check back sometime next week and find out.

My Week is Different

Today is Wednesday. It feels like a Friday. Wednesdays always feel like Fridays nowadays. It has something to do with working at a church.

When everyone else is happy to be off for the weekend, I am gearing up for a long day on Sunday.

Monday is spent on the little tasks that went undone on Sunday.

On Tuesday, my old church is having Vacation Bible School (for 5 consecutive Tuesdays--2 down, 3 to go). I am still a little involved at that church for the sake of my friendships and for the children I have taught. On Tuesdays, I am helping with the VBS for now. I am teaching the bible story...three times...to three very different but all boisterous groups.

On Wednesday night, I teach both the youth and the children. Usually it is some missions related stuff. Last week, I had to teach the adult bible study instead.

By Wednesday, it feels like a Friday. I am ready for two days of downtime. I use Thursday as my day of rest when I can. Resting does not include resting from laundry however. I don't mind doing laundry though.

Friday is the day when everyone says TGIF. But I have to say, at the end of this (Wednes)day, TGIW.

Thoughts about Breastfeeding After It has Ended

Last Tuesday, July 3rd, my youngest child turned 2. He is a sweet toddler. His temperament is wonderful except when he is tired in the late afternoon. He doesn't communicate with words much yet, but we have a speech therapist who visits once a week for 30 minutes to work with him. His lack of speech/communication issues is one of the reasons that I was still nursing him up until the day he turned 2.

Yes. I breastfed my child until age 2. There. I said it. Draw your own conclusions and then read why I feel compelled to justify this decision.

His older brother breastfed until he was 21 months. That was close to 2 years old. I kept nursing the younger brother because it was the strongest communication we had between us. I knew exactly how to calm him down and get him to settle down for a nap or for the night.

Yet, why should I feel so guilty admitting it?

I have always been pro-breastfeeding. I am not a breastfeeding Nazi like I used to be when I was nursing my first--I have met far too many women for whom breastfeeding did not work out even though they were desperate for it to work. But for me, breastfeeding was always the priority. My boys never tasted a drop of formula. It was difficult--especially with my first. All I can say is thank goodness for Lansinoh and the fact that I learned how to nurse my children while laying on the bed.

It is recommended that mothers try to nurse their babies for the first year of life. The World Health Organization even recommends two years. My goal for my first was 12 months. And then I took it month-by-month until I could tell that it was time to stop. My goal for my youngest was 18 months. And I stopped last week at his 2nd birthday.

Nursing in public has not been an issue with me with the second child. I kept to dressing rooms and out-of-the-way places with my first, but I was nursing my 3-day old infant in a restaurant without a second thought. We have nursed at the play area at the mall. At the circus. At the zoo. At church. At Christmas parties. Etc. Yet I did not nurse in public past 12 months.

The surprising fact to me is that I have felt guilty admitting to breastfeeding my toddler. Especially after 18 months, I never brought up the fact that I was still nursing. Honestly, I may have thought people would judge me for admitting it. I do not know of anyone who made it to 2 years (I just haven't met them yet). But why should I feel this way?

In the early months, breastfeeding is all about nourishment. In the last months, it is all about comforting.

Instead, I want to hold on to my memories of this time of my life. It opens a new understanding of what it means to provide nourishment to someone and, later on, comfort. It makes me reflect on the image of God as a nursing mother. A man can never understand that.

To nurse, you have to take care of yourself and be willing to provide for another creature. It means that you have slow down and stop something because your baby needs you. It forces you to pay attention and read the signs. As you look at the face of your baby and see the contentment that relaxes him or her to sleep, you see that you have a power in your milk.

I am excited to see how my toddler will grow. It is a bittersweet time as I have finished nursing. At my son's 2 year old checkup yesterday, I sheepishly told my pediatrician that I had nursed until he was 2. He said, "Good for you!"

RevGalBlogPals Friday Five: Choose your own adventure

Today's F5 is a Choose Your Own Adventure: do the magical version or the Muggle one, or both:

Option 1: Accio Friday Five!

1. Which Harry Potter book is your favorite and why?
My favorite has been the Goblet of Fire. I don't know why. I guess it was because I didn't like Order of the Phoenix when I read it. I did like Half-Blood Prince though. And after seeing the movie last night, I am rereading Phoenix, so I may end up liking it better than I thought.


2. Which character do you most resemble? Which character would you most like to get to know?
I like Neville the best. Ever since he stood up to Harry in the first book, I've been interested in him. I probably resemble him the most, too, as I feel that I am a late bloomer.


3. How careful are you about spoilers?
a) bring 'em on--even if I know the destination, the journey's still good
b) eh, I'd rather not know what happens, but I'm not going to commit Avada Kedavra if someone makes a slip
c) I will sequester myself in a geodesic dome to avoid finding anything out

A! Bring them on. I love spoilers. I read ahead in almost every fiction book I pick up. I love knowing how movies end before I see them.


4. Make one prediction/share one hope about book 7.
I predict that I will cry at some point during that book. Probably at the end.


5. Rowling has said she's not planning any prequels or sequels, but are there characters or storylines (past or future) that you would like to see pursued?
A prequel would be great. We have some glimpses into Harry's parents' lives. I would like to see the story of his mother and her family.



Option 2: Please Mommy, Anything But Those Blankety-Blank Books!


And we do mean anything:


1. Former U.S. First Lady "Lady Bird" Johnson died this week. In honor of her love of the land and the environment, share your favorite flower or wildflower.
My favorite flower is the tulip.


2. A man flew almost 200 miles in a lawn chair, held aloft by helium balloons. Share something zany you'd like to try someday.
I'd like to learn to play the banjo.


3. Do you have an iPhone? If not, would you want one?
I do not have one. I do not care for one. My VCast phone (that I inherited from my husband) will do fine until the battery wears out.


4. Speaking of which, Blendtec Blenders put an iPhone in one of their super-duper blenders as part of their "Will It Blend?" series. What would YOU like to see ground up, whizzed up or otherwise pulverized in a blender?
A Blendtec Blender--let them see if their own blender will blend.


5. According to News of the Weird, a jury in Weld County, Colo., declined to hold Kathleen Ensz accountable for leaving a flier containing her dog's droppings on the doorstep of U.S. Rep. Marilyn Musgrave, apparently agreeing with Ensz that she was merely exercising free speech. What do you think? Is doggy doo-doo protected by the First Amendment?
It may be protected as free speech, but it is not in good taste. Surely there were other ways to make a statement.

RevGalBlogPals Friday Five: Hasty Edition

Today, what are you:

1. Wearing T-shirt and jeans and my new watch I bought for the times I am not carrying my cellphone (Sundays at church when I need to know when to dismiss the youth Sunday School class)

2. Reading A Thousand Splendid Suns by Khaled Hosseini (I just picked it up at the library at 11:30, and I am already on page 52--I cannot put it down. It means that it is a good thing that I wrote 95% of my sermon for Sunday already because this book is going to be finished by this time tomorrow!)

3. Eating I just at a McDonald's Big Mac. I know, I know. But it is fast food friday here at the house after preschool (since the summer preschool session does not do a lunchtime). On the other hand, the Happy Meal toys are good ones this week.

4. Doing Reading my book, thinking about all the responsibilities I have for Sunday (and stressing), thinking of the last few paragraphs I need to write on my sermon, and checking in on my Neopets (and my friends who play Neopets and are in my guild).

5. Pondering 1. Why does my little boy not take naps since he turned 2 (on Tuesday)?

2. Are there enough clothes washed and ironed to take my husband through the middle of next week?

3. How much sunscreen am I going to need (for my pale self) next Tuesday when I take the youth to the water park?

Fire up the Grill

When I was growing up, my family never grilled out. My husband's family never grilled out. So I was very anxious about my husband's determination last year to cook out on July 4th for his co-workers. One of his co-workers gave him a charcoal grill. I was very anxious. I could just see him burning the house down because we didn't know the first thing about grilling.

A friend came over to give my husband a crash course in grilling hamburgers, and the friend was there to watch my husband on July 4th. Surprisingly, everything turned out well. My husband even grilled more hamburgers later that month.

This year, on Memorial Day, my husband fired up the grill again. I had thought that he had forgotten how to grill, but the hamburgers and hot dogs turned out just fine. He had remembered exactly how to do it whether it is because he never forgets anything or else it was some primal instinct that men seem to possess when it comes to grilling.

Anyhow, for father's day, I bought my husband a couple of steaks. Steaks are a step up from hamburgers. We marinated them, and he seasoned them. My husband grilled them, and they turned out absolutely perfect. He even grilled some corn on the cob, too.

I never would have guessed that this Chinese man, raised in a Chinese restaurant, who had never cooked more than fried rice under the watchful eye of his dad, would be such a grill master. He is awesome with the grill, and he is even attempting to teach me how to grill, too.

Since I hate to cook, I won't try to learn that quickly. I do not mind relinquishing the cooking duties to him at all.

Where Else Should I Be?

I feel so grateful to be working at a church. When I stand on the platform to help lead worship each Sunday (for the past two months), I feel so happy. I know that I am exactly where God wants me to be. I am doing something I love to do--even if I struggle to find appropriate children's sermons each week.

I cannot imagine being anywhere else but helping the people of God worship. It is very humbling, but at the same time I feel quite empowered.

The Call to a church was five years in the making. I have stacks of rejection letters and memories of rejection telephone calls. But just experiencing the acceptance of my church now, those letters and phone calls don't mean a thing to me anymore.

VBS Fun!

I had more fun than I thought I would have last week during Vacation Bible School. We had it from Sunday night to Thursday night; and thankfully, Thursday night was a fun night for the kids with hot dogs and chips and a "Bouncy Castle" for an hour. My 23 month old saw the castle inflating and started jumping up and down--with both feet never leaving the ground. He had been in one of them before at the preschool picnic in May, and he remembered.

Our VBS was small with about 15 children. I taught 4-5 grade and had one child--but he is a handful, so I think one-on-one attention suited him well.

Overall, I think VBS curriculum is too expensive for small VBS programs. I am very tempted to write my own curriculum for next year. I had better start on it right away.

Yeah, right. Let me have a week to recover first.

Or maybe a few months.

In any event, after 12 years of not being involved with a VBS program, I have returned to the summer ritual of my youth. Only this time, I am forever leading it.

Three words....

....Vacation Bible School.


I'm too exhausted to post.

Be back next week.